Monday, January 15, 2007

You 6a Mother

It's been a frustrating last few weeks, with some niggling muscle strains in my back and thigh for the last few weeks that just haven't seemed to heal properly and have stopped me climbing at anything like full strength, but yesterday I finally caught up with Lisa and Ant and became the newest member of the 6a club, by completing my first ever 6a boulder problem! Woo- as I believe they say in the States - Hoo!


If anyone is reading this from the States, by the way, it's a UK Technical 6a grade. According to this grade comparison chart, that could be anywhere from 5.11a to 5.12c (US), or 6b+ to 7b+ (French), or "a real sod" to "a right bugger" (Yorkshire)


It was no. 41 in the "Cave" section at The Castle, behind the two free-standing boulders "Lust" and "Envy" on the Mezzanine level. It had a sitting start, then went straight backwards over the ceiling, around the left-hand wall, and then straight backwards over the ceiling (crux) under the fingerboard to finish. Admittedly, it was probably one of the easier 6a's I've attempted - the holds were comparatively juggy for a 6a, but it was quite reachy, to the point where it was beyond Lise, at 5'6".


It took me four or five attempts to figure out the crux (hint: it's all about the toes of your right foot), by which time my elbow tendons were twanging white-hot and my abs were starting to cramp up - there were two separate "hang on to the ceiling with your finger tips and swing your legs from that side all the way over to this side, and just hope you've done it hard enough to reach the toe hold on the opposite wall" moves. I'm sure that kind of move must have a proper name, like a "dyno" or an "Egyptian", but I'm buggered if I know what it is - maybe I should just arbitrarily invent a name, like.... a "monkey-lunge" - yeah, that'll do for now.


Anyway, on the sixth attempt, I did the whole problem cleanly, start-to-finish, and collapsed onto my back, grinning like a village idiot and slowly getting my breath back. The trick is, as ever, to not hang around too long! With the crux being right by the lockers where everyone warms up, you get a small audience of other climbers going through their introductory contortions and watching you - raising eyebrows, nodding sagely, grimacing in sympathy at your failure to glue yourself to the ceiling by the sweat on your fingertips and suppressing a smirk when you land in a graceless, cursing heap. The trouble is you can never tell whether they're smiling because they're admiring your technique and trying to learn by watching your mad uber-l33t cl1mbz0r sk1llz (d00d!), or because they're quizzically bemused at the thought that anyone could actually be struggling with such a "punter" problem. (I mean, 6a??? Come on, that's practically a ladder! What's this guy's next "achievement" going to be - climbing the stairs to bed?) They could even be the setter of the route, inwardly shaking their head and thinking "no, you fool, not that way.... your FEET man! Sort yor FEET out! Muppet..."


After getting my breath back, and a couple of congratulatory hugs from Lise, I felt so flushed with pride that I proceeded to make a complete pigs arse of a "mere" 5b top-rope route, but I'd done my major achievement for the day and I wasn't going to let my abject failure to achieve anything else for the day stop me smiling about it :-)


So whoever set boulder problem number 41 on the Mezzanine - I think the ticket said it was some whipper-snapper who goes by the name of "Doors Off", whoever that might be - thanks for a great route, it's challenging but it never felt intimidatingly out-of-reach, and it's a really enjoyable climb. You've made a frustrated punter very happy!